Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Goat Vs Homework

Now a goat is not exactly a pleasant pet despite what people may believe, the Pigmy Goat especially.
They like to be scratched and petted like most animals, but its almost hard to get yourself to do so as the Male goat liked to Urinate in his face, curl his lip, and look at you. Yea everyone dreams of petting a Urine covered animal, I just dont get Animal Attraction sometimes bleh.
Anyhow I had this old Goat, he was a handful to say the least, he liked to jump on everything goat style, and loved to bury his horns in whatever may be nearby, especially your Arse should you be bent over.
He got us all a time or two but overall his relatively cute all be it pissy appearance kept him out of the butchering block and in our good graces.
Now as a goat he would eat damned near anything so garbage had to be kept in check, or anything else you may have to have sitting around. And one fine morning I would find this out. Now I was famous for not turning in my homework, usually because If I had not bribed some girl to do it for me it simply did not get done, on the rare occasions that I did do it usually I would forget it at home.
Well I was tired of Being threatened  with not passing if I did not turn in my homework, so one fine night I burned the midnight oil and got it done. I made sure to put it with all my school books and set it by the door so I couldnt forget it.
Now this morning was somewhat unusual for another reason, I was actually ready for the school bus, so what is a country boy to do with extra time on his hands before the bus shows up? Why take a leak next to a fence post and out mark the Farm Animals of course.
The biggest problem with this is you have to set down whatever you are carrying, upon turning back around there was that stinky old goat with a mouthful of my homework chawing down happy to have something unusual to eat. I tried to yank it from him but that turned into the usual play aspect and hits horns came to bear, uhhgg.
So I accepted my fate and faced grim faced teachers who did not buy yet another lame story "the goat ate it"
"Come on Mr. Sundberg you can do better than that"
If I could have, I would have, sigh.

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